I’m a big fan of small businesses. I like the personal touch, and the uniqueness of small ventures. In an increasingly homogeneous world where I can see the same stores, fast food joints and corporate giants in my home town back home in Blighty as I can see everyday in my adopted homeland of Canada, it is so refreshing to see the small, local and unique businesses. In my recent (and fruitless) quest for a decent snowblower, I have discovered a small, local business that sells nothing but snowblowers and lawnmowers, according to season. They have the time to answer questions, make recommendations and offer advice, and I’ll never wander in, fail to find what I am looking for and search for ten minutes for an employee only to be met with an I-don’t-care shrug and a grunted “Don’t work in this department.” The snowblower quest was fruitless because I started looking too late in the season, i.e., when the first snowflake fell. The friendly local folks at my new favourite store advised me to come in and order one early… in August!

But I digress. Bumbling back towards the love of small businesses, I must also add that the appreciation level rises when it’s a woman running the show. Never mind feminism, women still face challenges in the world of business, and when the woman is also a wife and/or mother, there are even more hurdles to business success. Domestic and maternal roles can so easily be full time, but for many women, financial necessity or inner drive motivates them to do more.

When I find a small business that caters to one of my various wants, needs or whims, and is also run by a person or persons with a professional approach and pleasant manner, it is a real treat. (I don’t suffer fools and poor customer service gladly, but that’s a rant for another day…). Bonus points if the business is run by a sister in Islam, of course. And extra props when the business serves both Muslims and non-Muslims, thus building bridges and demonstrating diversity in action.

So I think that one of the things I want to do here on my blog is make noise about any cool small businesses that I come across especially those that are run by Muslim sisters. But anything that I find cool is grist for the mill, so look out world!

There is a yawning chasm in the blogosphere today. It is with profound sorrow that I saw the awful finality of your last post, surrounded with rather funereal, even Gothic, black.

I discovered your blog a few years ago, in the wake of the female-led Jumu’ah prayer fiasco that attracted so much media attention and caused such a flurry of “progressive” comments, posts and razzamatazz. I was bumbling around the internet looking for voices of sanity. Yours was like a beacon slicing through the gloom of fitnah. From that moment I was hooked. I loved your writing style and your love for the diyn and the Sunnah.

I can’t say that I agreed with everything you wrote. Wouldn’t it be kind of boring if I did? We have somewhat different approaches to many matters of diyn. But what point would there be in stirring up arguments and enmity? We have different tastes in books, movies, clothes. You are business-minded and skilled in areas I find daunting. But we have in common our love of Rasoolullah, sall-Allahu ‘alahi wa sallam, and of the diyn, even of hijab, although you were reluctant to blog about it (and I haven’t quite decided on that score yet). When you chose to wax mystical, it may not have been my cup of tea, but it was your blog and you could write about whatever you wanted. You gave me a window into a part of the ummah with which I am not so familiar, but which is just that: a part of the ummah.

You wrote so many things that resonated so strongly with me. About the experiences of converts, about isolation and rejection in the community, and yes, about hijab too. With your own unique perspective, you brought me an awareness of racial issues, especially in the North American context.

Your love of art was a breath of fresh air. I am the daughter of an artist but art has often been lacking in my own life. The artistry and poetry that appeared in your blog were enriching. Your photos were also a joy to behold, and inspired me to get out and about with my own camera and see what I could make of the world around me, with the aid of a lens and a bunch of megapixels.

We have never met, but you introduced me to many people in cyberspace, through blogs and e-groups, and enhanced my friendship with a friend of a friend who lives on the shores of the same lake I do. (Although it is a big one – Great, even! – so we rarely meet IRL.)

Your humour, too, was a delight. Especially the whole pirates thing. “Pirates of the Caribbean” was one of the cases where I checked out a movie or book because you had raved about it. And there are some pretty cool lolcats running around too that are your fault!

And it is your fault that I started blogging, because you told me on more than one occasion that I should. I joined the fray and you left it. Bummer. I am still finding my voice, and one of the greatest voices in the blogosphere has fallen silent. I miss you.

I pray that your voice will not remain silent for long. You have a great talent with words and – dare I say it – an adoring public. Whatever medium you choose, I hope that we will hear your words again before too long.

Uhibbuki Fillah, ya ukhti.

For those in the GTA area, try to make it to this event next Saturday.  Rabia Khedr will be speaking on Noble Women in Islam.

Noble Women in Islam

October is Islamic History Month!

Event Info

Host:	Federation Of Muslim Women (FMW)
Type:	Education – Lecture
Network:	Global

Time and Place

Date:	Saturday, October 18, 2008
Time:	2:00pm – 3:00pm
Location:	Sheridan Branch Library
Street:	2225 Erin Mills Pkwy.
City/Town:	Mississauga, ON

Description

Come join Sr. Rabia Khedr for an interesting, one-hour session on noble women in Islam. Learn about the early Muslim women, and be proud of your rich heritage.

Did you know that in October 2007, the CANADIAN FEDERAL PARLIAMENT declared October as Islamic History Month? Watch out for more events throughout October!

Rabia is a community activist who makes things happen! This is an event to bring your daughters, little sisters, nieces, moms, aunties and friends to.

Sheridan Library is in Sheridan Mall, which is on the east side of Erin Mills Parkway, south of Dundas and north of the QEW.

I received this from a friend in an e-mail this morning. I think it makes for important reading. Although it refers to what’s going on south of the border, the movement for women to have the vote was ongoing in other countries at around the same time. It’s not just women who need a reminder, though. The level of voter apathy in Canada is pathetic. So many people like to moan about the government but if you couldn’t even be bothered to spend a few minutes at the polls, perhaps you might like to wonder why? I’m not the world’s most political creature but I do at least insist on voting in every election, at every level of government.

A message for all women

THIS IS MOVING.  HOW QUICKLY WE FORGET…..IF WE EVER KNEW……

WHY WOMEN SHOULD VOTE

This is the story of our Grandmothers and Great-grandmothers; they lived only 90 years ago.

Remember, it was not until 1920 that women were granted the right to go to the polls and vote.The women were innocent and defenseless,
but they were jailed nonetheless for picketing the White House,
carrying signs asking for the vote. And by the end of the night, they were barely alive. Forty prison guards wielding clubs and
their warden’s blessing went on a rampage against the 33 women
wrongly convicted of ‘obstructing sidewalk traffic.’They beat Lucy Burns, chained her hands to the cell bars above her head and left her hanging for the night, bleeding and gasping for air.

They hurled Dora Lewis into a dark cell, smashed her head against an iron bed and knocked her out cold. Her cellmate, Alice Cosu, thought Lewis was dead and suffered a heart attack. Additional affidavits describe the guards grabbing, dragging, beating, choking, slamming, pinching, twisting and kicking the women.

Thus unfolded the ‘Night of Terror’ on Nov. 15, 1917, when the warden at the Occoquan Workhouse in Virginia ordered his guards to teach a lesson to the suffragists imprisoned there because they dared to picket Woodrow Wilson’s White House for the right to vote.

For weeks, the women’s only water came from an open pail. Their food–all of it colorless slop–was infested with worms.

When one of the leaders, Alice Paul, embarked on a hunger strike, they tied her to a chair, forced a tube down her throat and poured liquid into her until she vomited. She was tortured like this for weeks until word was smuggled out to the press.

http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/suffrage/nwp/prisoners.pdf

So, refresh my memory. Some women won’t vote this year because–why, exactly? We have carpool duties? We have to get to work?
Our vote doesn’t matter? It’s raining? Last week, I went to a sparsely attended screening of HBO’s new movie ‘Iron Jawed Angels.’ It is a graphic depiction of the battle these women waged so that I could pull the curtain at the polling booth and have my say. I am ashamed to say I needed the reminder.

All these years later, voter registration is still my passion. But the actual act of voting had become less personal for me, more rote.
Frankly, voting often felt more like an obligation than a privilege.
Sometimes it was inconvenient. My friend Wendy, who is my age and studied women’s history, saw the HBO movie , too. When she stopped
by my desk to talk about it, she looked angry. She was–with
herself. ‘One thought kept coming back to me as I watched that
movie,’ she said. ‘What would those women think of the way I use, or don’t use, my right to vote? All of us take it for granted now, not just younger women, but those of us who did seek to learn.’ The right to vote, she said, had become valuable to her ‘all over again.’

HBO released the movie on video and DVD.I wish all history, social studies and government teachers would include the movie in their curriculum I want it shown on Bunco night, too, and anywhere else women gather. I realize this isn’t our usual idea of socializing,
but we are not voting in the numbers that we should be, and I think a little shock therapy is in order.

It is jarring to watch Woodrow Wilson and his cronies try to persuade a psychiatrist to declare Alice Paul insane so that she could be permanently institutionalized. And it is inspiring to
watch the doctor refuse. Alice Paul was strong, he said, and brave. That didn’t make her crazy. The doctor admonished the men:
‘Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity.’

Please, if you are so inclined, pass this on to all the women you know. We need to get out and vote and use this
right that was fought so hard for by these very courageous women.
Whether you vote democratic, republican or independent party – remember to vote.

History is being made.

Read more:

>http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/suffrage/nwp/tactics.html

>http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/suffrage/nwp/brftime3.html

I don’t whether to be happy or sad about this article in the Toronto Star this morning. I’m happy to learn that there is a real salon that is catering to hijabis, but some of the comments are pretty sad.

Apart from the usual “when in Rome” malarkey (oh puh-leeze. I will do the historically-slanted rant on that one day. It includes Sts Peter and Paul and the native peoples of this continent), there are people who Just Don’t Get why people who cover their hair would want to get it nicely cut, styled, tinted and so on.

Here’s how it works. Muslims, unlike Sikhs (with whom they are sometimes confused), are allowed to cut their hair. Many Muslim women, like  others of the female persuasion, like to look good. We don’t wear the headscarf 24/7 except in very trying circumstances, so when we are at home and happen to look in the mirror, we don’t want what we see to make us go “Yikes!” Much is often said about how Muslim women should beautify themselves for their husbands. There is that, but sometimes we just want to give ourselves a lift, and a haircut or the odd highlight can give a woman a boost. That’s just the way it is. Even those who claim not to be so concerned about their looks, or who choose to keep their hair long, or are too busy with life and small children to care about more than the occasional trim, welcome the opportunity to tame their manes once in a while.

I have had an appalling time finding hair care over the years. Most of the time I had to rely on favours from relatives and friends, and settle for the most basic of trims. Every once in while, there would be ladies who could come to one’s home, but such enterprises don’t seem to last long-term. There were a few Muslim-run salons who decided to offer the “separate room” thing, but then there would be issues like

- still expecting to wash your hair in the public area of the salon, which defeats the purpose of offering a private area

- making an appointment but then constantly slipping in people who phoned up and asked if they could come now. Which defeats the purpose of making an appointment. Bonus points (that was sarcasm, eh) if the other customer and hairdresser happen to be of the same ethnic or linguistic background, which really makes one feel excluded. No, I will not name ethnic names. It’s shabby no matter who is doing it to whom.

- suddenly withdrawing the private room provision but not telling you when you call to make an appointment, so you show up, then they treat you like poop for objecting to such treatment.

More recently I found a lovely Christian Arab lady who “gets it” when it comes to hijab and is able to provide hair care, either in her home where she has a separate room set up as a mini salon, or occasionally in her clients’ homes. 

Personally I have always found salons to be rather intimidating places, so have never yet worked up enough courage to walk into a place and ask whether they could accommodate my slightly odd request or not. I know that others have done so, with successful results. And I know that the worst that could happen is that they could say No.

As for people who think this is a Terrible Thing and that the Mozlems Are Taking Over… uh, no. I don’t think so. Business is business. As a consumer, I “pays my money and takes my choice”, and I take my business to the stores and service providers who offer what I want or need. As business owners, hairdressers and others are free to provide what they want to, what they feel will meet a need, desire or niche in the marketplace, and what they think will bring in the money. We once decided to try a new restaurant that had an Arabic sounding name. We had barely got in the door when the owner hollered at us: “We don’t have halal meat here!!” His hostile tone meant that he did not get our business. If he had wanted our business he could have informed us of that, politely, and pointed out fish or vegetarian options. He chose not to cater to Muslim customers and we chose not to give him our business. End of story.

So let the gripers gripe. We aren’t taking over the country. But I appreciate it when a business shows willing to cater to a need or preference of mine, whether it is religious, health-related or merely personal whimsy. I in turn am willing to check out what they have to offer. Hopefully it will be a win-win situation.

Much has been said about the fact that in many mosques. provision of women’s space is little more than an afterthought. I have been in many such places, and virtually gave up mosque attendance when my kids were small. But check out the mosque in ISNA Canada’s headquarters. Ma sha Allah. It has ample women’s space, decent washroom/wudu’ facilities, and a separate area for moms with tinies who attend the prayers.

view of prayer area

The separate room for moms with little ‘uns has a CCTV so if the tinies aren’t raising too much of a ruckus, they can still hear khutbahs etc.

Apparently they used that room for the men’s i’tikaf in Ramadan a few years back (grr!) but now they build booths along the sides of the men’s area for the brothers who want to observe that particular Sunnah.

moms

The decor of the mosque is quite simple, but refreshing. The dome has a little more decoration.

dome

A few years ago someone was researching this issue and thought I would be in the pro-curtain faction. Nope. The Sunnah is for the men to be in the front and the women to be in the back, but in the same space. I can’t tell you the number of time I have been in places where the women’s section is behind a huge, opaque barrier or even in a different room (bonus points if it is on a different floor…) and it is very hard to follow the prayers even if the PA system is functioning normally.

I wish all mosques could be like this…